If divorce or separating parents have children, a clean break usually isn’t possible. It is relatively common for parents to share parental rights and responsibilities even after their relationship ends. Many parents worry about sharing physical custody.
Parents may become so focused on parenting time that they overlook the importance of shared legal custody. Particularly when parents have arrangements to share parenting time, it is quite likely that they may share legal custody as well. What does that mean for a family?
Parents have to agree on major decisions
Legal custody involves the authority to make decisions. Parents who live together usually share that authority by default. When they live separately, shared legal custody requires certain practical efforts. For example, parents generally need to communicate with one another about their children.
A parent needs to know about their child’s performance in school, the status of the social relationships and their medical challenges to make appropriate decisions. Parents also have to communicate with one another when there is a major decision to make.
Shared legal custody typically means that each adult has the authority to make minor decisions during their physical custody time. A parent can choose where to take a child for stitches if they fall off their bike or whether they can attend a sleepover during their parenting time.
However, they may require the input of the other parent to make decisions that have longer-lasting implications. Parents may need to cooperate regarding a child’s mental health care, for example. They may both have a say in where the child attends school as well. Parents may find themselves disagreeing about major decisions that require both of their input.
What happens during a dispute?
Sometimes, parents who disagree about major decisions simply need time to consider the matter carefully and then discuss it again. If they find that they still disagree on critical decisions, then they may need to sit down with a neutral party. Pastors, family therapists and other trusted, neutral parties can sometimes help parents resolve their disagreements.
If they cannot agree on major decisions about their children, then they may need to take the matter to family court. Judges can potentially rule on specific disputes. They determine what they believe to be in the best interests of the children and advise the parents of their decision.
In some cases, legal custody disputes may result in judges opting to modify the custody order. Granting one parent final authority on certain matters can prevent similar issues from spiraling into protracted conflicts in the future.
Learning about and making use of legal custody rights can be important for parents who share their parental rights and responsibilities. Parents may need to stand up for themselves and their children in scenarios where one parent makes inappropriate decisions or attempts to cut them out of the decision-making process.
